Two Polish guys are sitting on a park bench, and a bum comes up to them. \u201cHey!!\u201d he bellows, in his hoarse voice. \u201cI got a riddle for you two.<\/p>\n
What has 2 heads, 4 arms, 4 legs, and stinks like SH*T??\u201d<\/p>\n
The Polish guys look at each other, and one of them shrugs, \u201cI give up, what has 2 heads, 4 arms, 4 legs, and stinks like SH*T??\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou and your friend!!\u201d the bum staggers away chuckling. The Polish guys look at each other and start laughing. \u201cThat was a funny riddle that bum told us\u201d, they say, \u201clet\u2019s go do it on someone.\u201d<\/p>\n
Laughing almost hysterically, they see two American guys.<\/p>\n
They come up to them and smile. \u201cHey guys!\u201d they laugh. \u201cWe got a riddle for you!<\/p>\n
What has 2 heads, 4 arms, 4 legs, and stinks like SH*T?\u201d<\/p>\n
The American guys shrug, waiting for the answer. The Polish guys chuckle again, and one of them says as he smirks \u201cMe and my friend!!!\u201d<\/p>\n
Had It All. This morning I was sitting on a park bench next to a homeless man.<\/p>\n
I started a conversation by asking him how he ended up this way. He said, \u201cUp until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to eat, my clothes were washed and pressed, I had a roof over my head, I had TV and Internet, and I went to the gym, the pool, and the library.<\/p>\n
\u201cI was working on my MBA on-line. I had no bills and no debt. I even had full medical coverage.\u201d<\/p>\n
I felt sorry for him, so I asked, \u201cWhat happened?<\/p>\n
Drugs? A-l.c.ohol? Divorce?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh no, nothing like that,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n
\u201cI was released from prison.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hi there. I\u2019m Bob. I\u2019m 80.<\/p>\n
Every morning, I sit on the same park bench and chat to my friend, Jim, who\u2019s a full seven years older than me. I\u2019ve always wondered where he gets all his stamina from \u2013 he goes for a jog each day without fail, before meeting me. And, amazingly, he\u2019s never out of breath.<\/p>\n
One fine day, I plucked up the courage to ask him: \u201cHey Jim, how on earth do you have all that stamina at your age?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, I eat Italian bread every day. It keeps your energy level high and you\u2019ll have great stamina with the ladies,\u201d Jim replied. Intrigued, I decided to visit the local bakery on my way home to find myself some Italian bread and hopefully get a vitality boost.<\/p>\n
As I looked around while trying to ensure that no-one caught on to what I was doing, the lady asked me if I needed any help. \u201cDo you have any Italian bread?\u201d I asked sheepishly. \u201cYes, there\u2019s a whole shelf of it.<\/p>\n
Would you like some?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI want five loaves.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMy goodness, five loaves?\u201d she exclaimed. \u201cBy the time you get to the fifth loaf, it\u2019ll be hard.\u201d<\/p>\n
I left as fast as my old legs could carry me!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Two Polish guys are sitting on a park bench, and a bum comes up to them. \u201cHey!!\u201d he bellows, in his hoarse voice. \u201cI got a riddle… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1863,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3923","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"brizy_media":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3923","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3923"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3923\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3924,"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3923\/revisions\/3924"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1863"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3923"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3923"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toppressnews.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3923"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}